Do What Now?

The other day I was talking about the concept of this blog to someone. Its about the post cutesy years, believe it or not, babies and toddlerhood ARE the cutesy years. Tweens and teens are the controlled chaos years.
These are the years when you really need support.

For instance - The case of the dumb girl with boobs.

A teenage girl that is friends with one of my children "accidentally" texted a boobie picture of herself to a boy. The boy threatened to blow it up and make posters.

#1 Oh hell no!
#2 Teenage girls of the world NEVER EVER EVER EVER DO THIS - It's actually considered child pornography.
#3 NEVER!

I'm not aware of this girl's family life and although this girl did something completely stupid it is the parents' responsibility to tell your kid not to do stuff like this in the first place.  Sure there's a possibility after you purge that information it will go into one ear and out the other and they'll do whatever they want anyways. Saying it is important though - comparable to making your kid put the Brussels sprouts on their plate even though they hate them. It's the routine of exhibiting your authority as a parent but not in an asshole way.
"Do it because I said so!" We all hate that right?  "Please be more vague, Mom."
You're raising people not pets. Remember we get pissed when people compare their cats & purse puppies to our children? Yeah.
Incidentally, the "Do it because I said so!" tends to be the most effective when you have your special girly time of the month. You've come this far together in life, kids know when mom is raging and they tend to not fight you much during your special time.  Rage mom is no bueno in anyone's book. Teenagers tend to want stuff all the time and over the years they master the when to ask mom for shit time. Feel free to throw down the "Do it because I said so!" then.

As an adult you even respect your parent in some form and it's easier to respect a parent when they are consistent and honest. When you respect your parent you tend to respect yourself, because you want your parent to respect you. Its a vicious cycle!

I do have to admit if this girl was my daughter I would probably get a little ghetto on her at first. Loud yelling, index finger waving wildly in the air... but I am overcoming my own background and learning to be a reasonable parent who can communicate things in English not in satanic tongues. It is incredibly hard at times but your children are the best thing you can invest yourself into so you gotta give it a go. If someone would've "handled" me like that during my teenage years I might have avoided a few bad choices.

To dumb boobs girl, like I've told my own children, don't share anything that you don't want someone to use against you in the future. That shit can sneak up on you out of nowhere. Its not the 1990s when we were able to get away with more stuff.  The technology you love so much ruins your privacy. Respect yourself enough to only share stuff like that with someone who deserves to see it.  Deciding who, needs to have a good amount of thought invested into it. Some moms will say don't share those at all until you are married but I know better. I know what teenagers do, I was one before...

Keep your shirts on-
xox-Thea

In 1997

Although this is a personal gripe, I think I know a few ladies out there that will commiserate with me.

In December of 1997 I received a $50.00 child support check (my court order was $747.00 a month). 

That was the only child support check I have ever received. 

I've thought about getting that date tattooed to commemorate that one time occasion to remind myself how capable I am. 

I've been looking at tuition fees for my daughter's college classes, no matter how capable I have been over the years I have to admit that money would've been helpful. Its hard not to dwell on that when I stare at all these upcoming costs. 

:/ -Thea

Recipe - Simple Granola

By request, which I am sure you'd want this to go with your crockpot yogurt  anyways - is my simple granola recipe.

Simple Granola

What I mean by simple is that you basically dump the ingredients into a bowl, bake said ingredients for a bit, let cool & then nosh.
I promise its that easy. I do this once a month so keep that in mind for the quantities I'm about to list below.

Things you'll need:

Big ass bowl - the biggest one you got
4 cups of oatmeal (not the instant kind nor steel cut oats)
3/4 cup of vegetable or canola oil ( I never notice the difference between the two oils)
1/2 cup of maple syrup - yes really maybe even more if you have a sweet tooth
1 tablespoon of molasses
1 tablespoon of vanilla extract
1+ tablespoons of cinnamon
1 teaspoon nutmeg
1 teaspoon of salt
1/2 cup of walnuts or almonds (optional) - I added a mixture of both to mine.

Preheat your oven to 325 degrees.
Grab a cookie sheet or two and your favorite flipper/spatula/pancake turner the debate is still out on what those things are really called.

Go ahead and mix all of your ingredients making sure that your maple syrup and oil is incorporated well.
Thinly spread your mixture onto your cookie sheets.

Pop into your preheated oven for 15-20 minutes - you should start to smell the cinnamon & vanilla wafting around in your kitchen at this point. Take it out move things around a bit with your flipper utensil so everything gets nicely toasted then pop it back in for another 10 to 15 minutes or more it really depends on your oven.

Once the mixture is cooled you can add some dried fruit.
To the batch pictured in this post I added:
1 cup of raisins
1 cup of craisins
1/2 cup of goji berries (because I'm fancy)
1/2 cup of dried apricots chopped
1/2 cup of dried apples chopped
Any dried fruits are great really.

And I'll be honest I pulled those measurements out of my ass. I didn't really measure the dried fruit I just dumped them out of the containers I had them in. But for those who love to be exact I guestimated those measurements just for you.

My sourdough starter off to the left, kombucha scoby experiment in the back &  my big bucket of granola front and center.

That's it. Now I will say that this recipe is not as sweet as the store bought kind or many other recipes that call for 2 cups of sugar. (WTF right?) I just like a little bit of sweet in the morning and this recipe mostly gets that from the dried fruits.

Store in a tupperware or something to keep the bugs out. I recycled an old ice cream bucket which is called the granola bucket of yum in my house. Your kids will shove their grubby little hands into this often so maybe keep it in a communal place for easy clean up.

Bucket of yum

Enjoy!
xo-Thea

Words For My 17 Year Old Self

Like they say hind sight is 20/20.

There are a few things I wish I could've said to my 17 year old self. Not that I would've listened to much because frankly I was a big jerk. Above and beyond the typical 17 year old jerkiness - I was actually a juvenile delinquent. A frequent phrase I heard my dad say in my teenage years was "God damn it Thea". I swear that phrase was my name. But maybe just hearing wise words would've made me stop for a second and think.

I wish I could've said that no matter what anyone says to you if you've done wrong at 17 it is not the end of the world. There is no script prewritten for your life. You do not have to follow a predestined path just because you "messed up". You are very young and it's your time to make mistakes. There are shorter ways to achieving things but some take the long hard road. Sometimes that makes life richer.

I wish I would've confirmed that friends are very important. If you are lucky enough to have grown up with a handful of friends try to stay in touch through the years. Its a truly humbling feeling when you reminiscence with those who knew you then. Talking with old friends is like going "home". And the 35 year old self knows that it's surprising to see how many pass on much too young. Enjoy them and their company while you can, because if you are like most folks you come from a dysfunctional family and they will be your family.

I would've like to say that being 30 isn't bad at all and it's not old. Most who are 30 something are still figuring stuff out. Also that most of the problems you have now, someone telling you what to do, your best friend's boyfriend leaves her for someone else, yada yada ya are all still problems for you in your older self's life. Now you just have bills to pay and kids of your own to feed.

I wish I could've said that the guy you first loved will the only one you love freely, honestly and stupidly. No one else will ever receive love in that way from you ever again. First love is so true and simple. You will breathe him in, fall head over heels in love and you'll never forget his smell, smile or silly mannerisms even after its long done. Every love after that comes reservations from past hurt and though they might be small there will be walls that you put up to protect yourself from hurt. That first love is a special one so be picky and cry a lot when its over. If he cries too thats how you know he loved you as much as you loved him.

I wish I could've whispered that - you don't HAVE to get married. A man will not fulfill your life nor will he ever complete you. That is something you discover for yourself on your own. You hope that you find someone who compliments you not completes you. That way it never gets boring. That way you are still you and you can be individuals who choose to compliment each other. I know this now after I've seen many marriages fail.

I wish I could've said that compromise is the baseline in life. Many disappointments pop up as you walk along into the future and some can be devastating in the moment but there is always a way out it just might not be the one you thought it would be. It will be okay as long as that is your goal. No need to get so hotheaded and argue to the death because you think you are right. Push your passionate feelings into doing something good.

I wish I could've said many things to my 17 year old self, tell your dad you love him and hug more than you did, show off your mid waist more because having babies messes that shit up, stay up late and watch the stars with friends, don't bother wearing too much make up because your skin is perfect.

The 17 year old me

I see myself and my close friends aging but I still see their 17 year old faces in them and it is fun to reflect on where we've come from, where we've been and where we're going to. Since saying all of the things above isn't possible and many things have passed by like anyone else's life I say these things to my children.  How about you? What would you like to tell your 17 year old self?

xo-Thea

Seattle Local Moms

First Happy Friday! I hope you'll get to indulge in a little extra sleep tomorrow morning.
Please forgive the cross post from my personal blog, but this is some exciting times for one of our contributors - Jessi.  She is doing some speaking engagements today and tomorrow so I just wanted to pass that info along.

--
My friend who've I may or may not have posted some slightly incriminating or silly pictures here on my blog, recently wrote a book:

Called Free-Range Chicken Gardens: How to Create a Beautiful, Chicken-Friendly Yard - By Jessi Bloom.

As you can gather from the title its about Free range chickens. If you've been paying attention to the latest additions to the slow food / urban homesteading movement you'll know that chickens are *the* thing right now. I can list off about 30 people I know who have, recently attained or intend on getting chickens. What a great benefit of fresh eggs right outside your back door, free range chicken meat or just cute little pets if you don't eat meat. I'm all for having chickens for those reasons.

You might think that you'd get a biased review from me a friend of the author, but you'd be wrong.  I can't fib to save my ass. I even "constructively critiqued" her yesterday about a television appearance she made. Yeah- I'm THAT friend.  So disregard any thoughts along those lines.

Her book addresses the very basics - the life cycle of a chicken, breeds & coop care.  On to sample garden plans with diagrams and information about choosing the right plants to coexist with your chickens.  I don't keep chickens, so a lot of the chicken information was totally new to me. I am an avid food gardener. While terms like nitrogen fixers and dynamic accumulators are fluent terms to me, she breaks it down for those who are new the gardening realm. I'll even be so bold and say that an advanced gardener would be able to take away a lot of helpful information about incorporating chickens into their gardens.

There is so much great information in this well laid out book. The pictures are fantastic, the diagrams are easy to follow for those who are visually inclined like myself. So much so that my 3 oldest children (teenagers) have been casually reading it at the breakfast table.  Their young sponge like minds are taking an interest in something that was very common just a couple generations ago.  If you can hold a teenager's attention you know there is some captivating information in there.

Jessi will actually be at the Northwest Flower & Garden Show in Seattle this week for her "What the Cluck" seminars & book signings. All the details about her appearances are available on her blog - Garden Fowl.

If you happen to have an inkly of bringing home some chickens I hope you'll pick up a copy. It will definitely teach you all you need to know before and after you bring them home.


Happy Friday Friends!
~Thea

Life Without A Microwave

Over the weekend our microwave died. No rhyme or reason as to why. No big explosions, or even any weird electrical burning smells. It just quit. It was only 6 months old.

R.I.P.  microwave

You would think a family of 6 would immediately run out and go purchase another one right? Not in our case. I jokingly said, "Well no more microwave for us." My two oldest kids then said, "Oh we'll be just like our friends."
What? Their friends also have a family of 6, our kids are all pretty much the same age. They've been living without a microwave for years. All of a sudden I felt like I was not a part of some big slow food movement thing. I posted a little mention of this "experiment" on my Facebook and I was surprised how many don't have one or don't use the one they have. Of course I got responses like 'Umm just go to Walmart and get another one." "How did anyone survive before microwaves!"
We'll we're going to give it a try. So far no one has complained, except for me. I used to reheat my coffee a lot.  A few think I'm insane but I'm an insane lady with a lot more counter space!
A microwave that dies after 6 months is just another "disposable" thing that I'm not interested in.
How about you? Do you have a microwave? Do you use it or does it just take up space? I'm really interested to know.

Thea

College Junk Mail

Seattle Pacific, University of Portland, Lewis & Clark College and Montana State University

I know the picture is horrible, but you can make out that the above picture is envelopes from colleges.
We've been getting them daily for my oldest kid.
Wanna talk about being emotionally compromised over stupid junk mail. I get all mushy and want to burst out into tears over stupid mail! I'm getting closer to letting my girl "go". Sure I have 3 others but everyday in my house everyone has a special addition to our daily activities. Whether its good or bad if one is gone its weird and awkward during their absence. The thought of my girl not being here on the daily, sorta terrifies me. I've had her with me since I was 18 years old, before my husband even. I am going to miss her!

As with any parent issue, I've found some online articles of other's experiences with their kids going off to college. Most of them are typical and say; "Oh he's off on a new adventure." "She looked so smart when we left her at the dorm with her new books." What!?! Don't these people have souls? Okay that is taking a bit far, but who the hell is honestly happy and thrilled about this? Let's be real, isn't this the time to really freak the fuck out as a parent? College, freedom, no parental supervision = pure crazy. I was a devil child so naturally late high school and the first years of college was the best for me. But if you were paying attention in the last paragraph you'll notice I said my daughter has been with me since I was 18. Uh huh...Thankfully my kid is smarter than I was so I don't think her story will play out like mine has. I can't help but worry though, its my job.

This journey is gonna be rough, no denying it - I'm freaking out about mail for Pete's sake. On one hand I feel like we are coming to an end of a journey and I'm passing the baton off to my daughter and telling her to go. On the other hand I'm wanting to say; "Screw you, I'm not ready!" and bolt off in another direction.

:/ - Thea